Sunday, November 16, 2008 | Opinion, Politics
Are you a jackalope?

I am the jackalope of which Jonah Goldberg speaks (I say as I groom my antlers)

By Stephanie Ramage

I am the jackalope of which Jonah Goldberg speaks (I say as I groom my antlers). 

I am an economic conservative who is socially liberal. I’m a Peter Viereck conservative. Viereck once said that he opened American minds to the idea that conservatives were not Satanists, “and then [William F.] Buckley walked in.”

He also said, “Today the shell of the ‘conservative’ label has become a chrysalis for the opposite … at worst for thought-controlling nationalism, uprooting the traditional liberties (including the 5th Amendment) planted by America’s founders.”

As a jackalope, I believe in small government, the free market, a rigorous and voluntary educational system, and in acting in the best interest of America, even if that means losing some friends overseas. But I am most definitely not an isolationist. On the contrary, I believe that America, because of its powerful position, has a responsibility to the world.

I don’t believe in demonizing immigrants. I don’t believe in special treatment for groups who claim to want equality, and I don’t care who you marry, what you do in your bedroom or who you do it with—as long as they’re consenting adults. As I’ve said before, I am pro-choice up to a point, that point being the end of the first trimester, which means that I support Roe v. Wade. But I would not be welcome in the liberal fold because I do not believe that abortion should be allowed right through the entire nine-month pregnancy. I believe that at some point it is, in fact, murder.  

 The new GOP’s adherents—so the movie “An American Carol” would have us believe—love country music and NASCAR, and anyone who doesn’t is a liberal. I got the message loud and clear when I went to see “An American Carol,” probably the worst movie ever made. I got up and walked out.

I don’t like country music. I don’t hate country music fans or musicians—they mostly seem like nice people—but until this year I never felt that country music adoration was a prerequisite for being a conservative. As for NASCAR, it shares a lot of characteristics with the European racing circuit, so tagging it as entirely American redneck is silly. I’m just not a racing fan.

I am not a religious person, but I can clearly see the critical role that religion has played in the history of humanity, and continues to play today. However, I don’t believe that public funding should be used to promote religion because that, in essence, creates a state religion, something our Founding Fathers strongly opposed.

Maybe what the split in the GOP will turn out to be is the birth of a real new party (as opposed to the Democratic sidecar the Libertarian Party has become). Why not the Jackalope Party? Write to me at stephanieramage@sundaypaper.com if you believe you are a jackalope. I’d like Jonah to know that I am not alone. SP