Sunday, September 16, 2007 | Quick
Blindsided

There’s no escaping Britney Spears

Britney Spears politely donned undies and extensions on for her comeback, but forgot how to dance and lip-sync. CREDIT: Kevin Winter/Getty Images

By Caren West

I am not usually the type of gal who peruses celebrity blog sites as I sip my coffee or picks up the current issue of People, OK and In Touch magazines for light reading. Although I enjoy a good “E! True Hollywood Story” from time to time, I have not yet fallen victim to our society’s current state of celebrity obsession, a condition I like to call “celebrobsessed.”

Innocently, I was getting my news fix on CNN the morning after this year’s MTV Video Music Awards, which I purposely did not watch, and the next thing I knew was sucked into the Britney comeback scandal. I did not want not to be interested. I tried not to care. But I found myself sitting in front of my television and unable to turn away as she muddled her way through her new single “Gimme More” in front of all of her peers and approximately 7 million television viewers. Although I cringed and felt badly for her, I could not force myself to change the channel—or even look away.

When I arrived to my office, instead of checking messages or e-mails, I immediately Googled Britney for one more peak. It was kind of like stumbling across sour milk. I had to smell it again to make sure it really did stink.

Days later, I was still reading Brit headlines. When I felt myself slowly slipping into the unfamiliar realm of the celebrobsessed, I immediately sought counsel from the most well-respected, hardest-working and successful Atlanta businesswomen I know. Here’s a sampling of what they had to say:

“The really tragic part is not her outfit, lip-syncing or dancing—or excuse me, walking around stage—it’s the fact that all of us will secretly buy her new CD the week it comes out. We’ll secretly purchase it online and then practice Britney’s “new” moves in the comfort of our living rooms.” —Amanda Leesburg, Amanda Leesburg PR

“I also noticed myself being unusually bewitched, especially when listening to people talk about it on the radio (I like to imagine what facial expressions they are making during their commentary).  I think she’s a metaphor for America, really—a Kool-Aid mustached, barefoot, partially hydrogenated, sluggish fallen star that doesn’t realize her own tragic unraveling because she is busy putting Calamine lotion on her kid’s mosquito bites and eating Doritos. She is our anthem. Anyone feel like singing?” —Emilie Claeyes, interior designer, Hirsch Bedner Associates

“So, yes, I will admit, I love celebrity gossip. I blame this mostly on Angelina Jolie. Had she not stolen Brad from Jennifer, I probably would have never purchased my first US Weekly and thus begun my complete obsession with tabloids and celebrity blogs. Prior to that, I was a strictly ‘read the covers while standing in the grocery line’ type of girl.” —Sarah Crosland, The Atlantan
 
“From what I’ve seen of the VMA performance, I can say this: She didn’t want to be there and neither did her extensions. Don’t worry about the obsession; it will pass.” —Teresa Mariano, editor in chief, H Magazine

“Displaying that much apathy towards a crowd of ridiculously talented (or just well connected) people takes a lot of effort. She might have the last laugh because days later, we’re still talking about it. And with an album on the way out, is that really a bad thing?” —Angeline Vuong, Butch Walker’s assistant

“I try not to pay attention but it’s impossible when I’m prepping my show—every music site I go to has something on one or the other of them. This begs the question why our culture feeds on this kind of thing. Did the media create the frenzy looking for ways to fill the 24/7 paradigm or did we as a society ask for this dumbing down? But what do I know of these things? I’m just a DJ.” —Margot Smith, music director and on-air personality, Dave fm

“Maybe all of us Britney-obsessed people are actually just terribly compassionate. Or maybe we are just grateful that, on our worst day, we still won’t be dancing in a sparkly bikini on national television.” —Meryl Bryant Arnett, account executive, Melissa Libby & Associates SP

When not attending Atlanta’s hottest parties, tracking down celebs or shopping for shoes, Caren West runs her own PR firm. E-mail her at carenwest@sundaypaper.com.